Scare-cuts tantrums and sundaes

Hello! A few developments for you first off. I can now point (when prompted) to my own ears, nose and mouth although I still struggle with the eyes....
I've learned the word 'cake' which is proving to be very usefull after i've finished my main meal of an evening.
So now on to out and about news....

Here's Max and I after we terrorised Fantasyland for the afternoon on Thursday. Max ran dad ragged and made him go down the tube slides and everything. We had some great bundles in the ball pools, although I did have to fend off a few other kids who thought they could also join in. I got loads of cuddles off of Emma and she put me through the soft mangles which was really funny. I even had a fruit shoot and didn't spew it up again. Max was really cool and could do all the climbing stuff really well, I was in awe. I eventually bit my lip and looked like a vampire.... I hope we get to do this again soon.
On Saturday they took me swimming. They hadn't asked me if I actually wanted to go swimming, they just took me. As it happens I didn't want to go swimming and nothing they could do would convince me otherwise. I cried for Britain until they finally relented and took me back to the changing room to end the whole sorry affair. Grand total of time in the pool, less than five minutes.....oh dear.
We went down the town in the afternoon, it was okay. We went to see Aunti Chris at work and guess what? I got a balloon!
We stayed in on Saturday night, here I am trying to scare Simon Cowell with my ghost disguise:

I must be a lot less scary than I used to be as the cat decided to spend the evening indoors with me rather than take her chances with the fireworks outside, we're getting along nicely now.
On Sunday I decided to give my kitchen staff the day off and we went to the carvery for lunch:

Andy, Ben and Rach came along too so that was good. I made up for the swiming debacle by being a good boy, especially when my ice-cream turned up.
Last night was haircut night again. Mum distracted me with Postman Pat while dad hacked away. They seemed quite pleased with the results but quite honestly I couldn't care less.
Think thats it for now, have a good week, till next week.....

Pucker up....

Greetings my autumnal friends! It's a bit more chilly in the mornings on the way to nursery now and dark when we go and pick mum up from work.

Just a random picture of me reading a book in my room for you there!
I've learnt kissing this last week or so and nothing is safe from my pursed lips. Teddy, tigger, Zeddy the rocking Zebra, pictures of cats in books and sometimes even mum are on the recieving end of a Nedster smackeroonie!
Friday was Dad's birthday, I got him a really smart card with a monkey peeping on it. I like it more than he does and keep pointing it out to him. Mum got him some presents but they weren't anything like as exciting as the ones I had for my birthday although ripping the paper off was great fun. Can't wait until christmas....
They went out on Friday night so it was left to an Aunty Chris AND Nanny 'tag-team' to look after me. Mum was just saying that i'm always happy to be left with Nanny so I thought i'd turn the waterworks on just to give her a twinge of guilt before they went out to stuff their faces without me. I soon forgot about them though and had a good night, I even filled my nappy good and proper for Aunty Chris!
On Saturday mum went to work, so dad and I had our usual leisurley breakfast in front of the morning line before doing some more lazing about until it was lunchtime when we took mum out for lunch. Saturday afternoon we went to fix nanny's telly so that was a special bonus visit for her....lucky devil!
Sunday morning grandad and Anne came around and Grandad dragged me around the floor in a nice Ned-Sized cardboard box. It was great fun until the box ripped open and I fell out of it. Dad and I also experimented with a new line in headgear:

We are style icons, I kept mine on for ages but dad just couldn't hack it. We went out for a walk in the afternoon, nothing too exciting.
Mum was off monday, I wound her up all morning and in the afternoon we went to Fantasy Land:

I'm getting a lot more confident at all the climbing and that now although I went into the upstairs section for the first time which I wasn't too sure about. We had a good afternoon and we were all tired out when we left.
So there we have it, another weeks worth of fun and games.

Hair care tips

Allright then everyone? I am thanks....
Well Thursday night Grandad and Anne turned up so I knew something was going down. I got my best sulk on and cried for Britain, I love making it difficult for them to leave. For maximum effect I pushed my pink angst ridden face through the cat flap for dad to see as they pulled away in the car. As soon as they were out of the road it was business as usual playing with Grandad and Anne before going off to bed.
As is now becoming the norm, Dad sloped off out on his bike Saturday morning leaving me and mum to fend for ourselves at breakfast time. I set a new Commonwealth record of six, yes that's right, SIX bowls of rice krispies. Result. In the afternoon we went horse racing. The parade ring was brilliant, I could see the horses close up. There are no pictures though as dad left the camera batteries at home. I think he must have lost them in the same place as the form book as they only had one winner between them all afternoon.....very poor. Trish, Al, Matthew and Carrie-Anne were there as well which was smart. I got cuddles off of the girls while we watching the racing from right down on the rails. I think they fared a little better with the gambling than mum and dad did. I'd also like to thank the nice man that helped dad carry me over the railway bridge in my pushchair.
As if they hadn't frittered enough of my milk money/college fund away they had a poker night on Saturday. So I got to see everyone for a bit before I was put to bed. Apparently mum won, good work, now where's that Early Learning Centre catalogue, Christmas is coming you know!
Sunday we went to some shopping place in Bicester, it was rubbish but they had a good playground.

I thought this might make a good record cover for my first album? I had a great game of peep-bo with an older boy, he was great fun and the slide was really good too.
So thats the out and about section covered, what else have I been up to? Well first of all I have really been getting into Zeddy Zebra (last years Christmas present) and have been upping the ante a little bit by doing 'no-handed' rocking and 'standing on the seat' rocking. Dad hasn't managed to get any pictures of me in full flight yet as i'm keeping these specialised moves until I really have them nailed. I did let him have one of me during the dismount phase of a seat standing manouver on Nemo though:

Now then, as all you lovely ladies know, hair care is very important. I have been using a special organic conditioner over the weekend:

Pear skins! I thought it might leave a deep glossy shine but it infact left a horribly clagged mess that took a good dose of washing out...back to the drawing board on that one I think.

It's all going on

May I extend a warm welcome to you all again friends.
Well it's getting dark early at night and not till later in the morning so i'm struggling to get up for nursery when it still looks like the middle of the night outside.
In other news, i've got a number of jobs to do around the house. I feed the cat each evening and funnily enough, she seems to really like me now. I also have to lay the table (sort of). Dad gives me the condiments over the kitchen gate and I go and put them on the table one by one before we have dinner. I ain't doing any washing up though....
Last Wednesday we had a right housefull! Nanny and Aunty Trish (the Ebay wizard) came round to see me and then just in time for the football Owen, Andy, Rach and Ben turned up. A bit later on Nick and Carol arrived too. It was great to see them all and I had loads of lovely targets for my books.
Hmm what else, we had a right weekend of it. Saturday mum went out to a meeting so dad and I lazed about and watched the morning line before having a leisurley breakfast. After a hectic morning I had a kip in the afternoon...it's all go! In the evening we went to Pizza Hut. I gorged on Fruit Shoot until I couldn't take any more and spewed into the tray on my high chair. I very nearly filled it up and it was hilarious to watch dad try and clean it up using only one small napkin. I was okay afterwards though so we went down to the fair. It was my first time and I really enjoyed the flashing lights and loud music, perhaps they could take me to Liquid next week? Or then again, maybe not....
Sunday was Monkey World day, mum has been going on about it for ages and she finally wore us down.

The best bit was the crunchy gravel to run around in! The monkeys were okay though once I realised they were safely enclosed and posed no more of threat to my safety than mum or dad usually do. I made monkey noises and beat my chest at the ones I liked and ignored the ones I didn't. There were some smart playground stuff:

They wouldn't let me go on the go-karts, killjoys! I don't care if I couldn't reach the foot pedals! Still, I had a go in this lorry:

Dad scared the life out of me in the gift shop with a glove puppet, how was I supposed to know it wasn't a real monkey?
Monday saw another accident report form from Nursery, and once again it was a bicycle related lip injury. The reason for it was there in black and white on the form though, I had a tantrum at another kid that was already on the bike. Shamed. I fall off bikes more than dad, that pleases him I think, but then I am pushing the performance envelope while he stays well and truly in his comfort zone the big wet.
Tuesday we went to see mum for lunch and she let me have some coke up a straw, it made my face go all funny with the bubbles after each slurp. I can't believe they drink that stuff. We popped in to see Aunty Chris and she gave me another balloon, smart! After that we went to get Nanny and then on to Fantasy Land. I was a bit more up for it on this occasion and soon got stuck in to the slides, climbing things and ball pools. I think I wore them both out well and truly before I decided to let them go home......

Still runny!

Hello all! I'm still a bit loose in the old nappy department. Mum had to take a stool sample from me and take it to the hospital, I think dad was pleased to get out of that one. Anyway, they couldn't find anything wrong with it so thats good I suppose. It's quite common at nursery by all accounts. I didn't go to nursery at all last week, mum looked after me in the morning every day....I wound her right up and make no mistake!
So, what else has been going on? Saturday we went to Paul's to watch the football on his fancy new television. I got to harass Andy, Owen, Chrissy, Paul and Uncle Alan so that was pretty good. Grandad and Anne looked after me Saturday night so mum and dad could go down the pub.
On Sunday we went shopping in Reading, they were crossing their fingers that my backside would hold out for the day...it did! We even did some christmas shopping and ate sarnies in the sunshine!
Monday was back to nursery, and in the afternoon we took Nanny out for a walk around Greenham Common. We walked for miles and miles in the warm sunshine which was nice. We saw some cow's as well, they were pretty big so I didn't want to get too close but neither did Nanny!
Tuesday lunch time we went and joined the library, I got to take four books away (either with animals in them or mechanical diggers) without paying for them or anything! All i've got to do now is work out some top notch hiding places so dad gets stitched up on overdue charges.
Fashion advice:
This seasons hot look is the apron!

You heard it here first.
I've been wearing this at every oppurtunity lately, I think it looks rather dashing although it makes it a bit more tricky for dad to get my seatbelt on in the car.
What else has been going on...hmm....i'm really enjoying playing with my mini football. Sometimes I actually kick it around but mostly I throw it at dad or mum with all the pace of a fastbowler. My dancing is coming along nicely as i've got a few more moves in my repetoire.
I've also decided enough is enough on the lay in front at the wekends. I used to let them laze around in bed until gone nine o'clock sometimes on saturday or sunday but not anymore! My new regime is one up, all up by 7am....they'll thank me for it in the long run, they'll waste their lives in bed!

Coming from both ends!

Hello again, sitting comfortably? Then i'll begin!
Sue joined the select few on the illustrious list of Ned sitters last Friday. We read books and had a nice time. Mum and Dad keep trying to sneak out while i'm distracted in these situations, but I know whats going on when Mum disappears upstairs to get ready and Dad looks at his watch, then up the stairs, then back at his watch again.....suckers!
Mum worked on Saturday, so we took her out for lunch and popped in to see Auntie Chris at her work....have a nice holiday!
In the afternoon some of the family from Kent were up for a visit! I got to meet Brian, Mary, Mark, Zoe and best of all Kiri:

I'm not sure exactly what relation I am to all these people, it's too complicated for me to fathom out. But I enjoyed showing off for them, they were a great audience.
We watched some horse racing on TV and Dad blew bubbles for our entertainment before I was sick all over Nanny's floor and chair as well as all down my smart shirt and all over my shoes. Uncle Slim had also turned up and gave me a cuddle while dad and Nanny cleared up the mess, I managed to get the sick from my shoes all over his nice golfing clobber....oh dear!
Althought there was no further puke, the other end was certainly getting busy....I don't think I ought to go into too much detail but it was pretty messy in the back section.
We didn't do much on Sunday as they were scared to take me out anywhere. We went out in the garden for a bit while they actually did some gardening and had a small walk in the afternoon. Pretty low key for us lot really.

I've been off nursery Monday and Tuesday because of my continuing gravy bum, although i've been feeling fine in myself and going about my usual business. Hopefully things will be more solid in the morning.....
Hopefully i'll some more high octane action to report on next week.

Fat Lip

Is it that time of week again? Must be! Here we go again then.....
Nanny got me a drum!

Brilliant! Although so far I think dad has been more annoying with it than I could ever hope to be.
Last Friday was 'Grandparents day' at Nursery. Nanny got to come in to nursery and play with me all morning which was pretty smart. She could see all my little friends and see exactly what I get up to, she's not to let on to Dad though, I like to keep him in the dark, knowledge is power!
Saturday morning I awoke early to find out dad had cleared off out on his bike so poor old mum had to get up and deal with me early doors on her own! I ate four bowls of Rice Krispies.
When dad got home we went up to the Sun in the Wood for luncheon. I really enjoyed their playground and most of all my Fruit Shoot drink! In the afternoon we went to see Slim and Trace, I hadn't seen them for a while. I soon warmed up to them again and posed for some pictures for Slims fancy new phone! In the evening we had a bit of a BBQ:

Everyone played with my toys (especially the golf clubs and beach ball) and I got to have my tea in the highchair on the patio...in the dark!!!
Sunday I was up early doors again, we didn't do too much, just went for a walk around Penwood and then home. Dad did a roast in the evening but the two early starts and late nights had caught up with me:

I fell asleep before I even finished my grub!
Monday saw my second accident report slip from Nursery. The details on my form read that I had fallen off a bike and bit my lip! I was treated with a cold compress and some TLC! It's not fair, I bet when dad falls off his bike he doesn't let on and keeps it to himself but I have to have it filled out in triplicate for the world to see and keep on record! It didn't look to bad and you couldn't even see it by today.

Back on the Beach!

Yes, you can rest easy, i'm back!
Been off to that there Cornwall once again. The weather was mostly good, although it was a bit wet on Wednesday and Thursday. Auntie Chris flowed me a few quid to get something while I was away so I secured a rather fancy Quicksilver T-Shirt which i'm sure i'll be flaunting in front of you all soon. Rest assured it's a strong look.
It was business as usual, wetsuit on and flicking sand even though I didn't eat quite as of the sand as I did last time.

Now then, i'm not so sure about this one but I ended up sleeping in the wardrobe for a week:

It wasn't all bad though because as soon as I woke up I could wake mum and dad up to get the brekkie sorted out sharpish. This left Chrissy the other bedroom to himself and Andy out in the lounge with 24 hour teletext. Everyones a chicken dinner!
While we're on the subject of dubious parenting, here I am taking a bath in the sink:

Surely thats against current EU legislation or something?
Dad and I got photographed on Fistral beach by some bloke from the council for their website! Must have been my good looks and not dad's 'lean surfer physique' (ahem) that caught his eye....

Here's a few random shots, me on the beach on my own!

Here I am on the moon with Neil and Buzz and some random alien bloke.
I think Mum, Chris and Andy set a new world record for Sudoku while we were away, dad didn't succumb though.....scared of lookng dimwit when he couldn't do it I reckon!
So thats that for another season, it seems to have gone in a flash this year, roll on next time!
Other news? They took me to Newbury show on Sunday to see the animals. Just a small tip, don't show me any creature other than Horses, Cats or maybe the occasional dog as everything else is rubbish and makes me cry (eg Sheep, Goats, Hens, Pigs). Here's my kind of livestock:

The sign says 'rare breed pigs', they were so rare there wasn't actually any of them, which suited me just fine thank you very much.
Sunday night Aunty Chris looked after me while the parents went to see a Reel Big Fish in Reading or something like that.
Monday came and it was back to nursery, but on Tuesday morning I went to work with dad for an hour before he took me to nursery as mum was off to Birmingham or something or other. It was pretty cool and I got on well with all the blokes in his office and got to play with dad's computer and dribble on his keyboard.
On a more creative note, i'm pursuing a new career in jelly DJ-ing:

Here I am mixing some 'flavours' the other night!
Dad just didn't underand my art and was hell bent on wet wiping me within an inch of my life and getting the dishes out of my reach. I can only imagine Jimi Hendrix had to struggle with similar adversity to fulfill his artistic drive in his formative years.....

Golf, slides, age concern and fancy shoes!

Hello once again.
What have I got to tell you about this week then....hmmm, let's think.
Dad worked another afternoon on Wednesday so Nanny and auntie Chris looked after me. We had a great afternoon and by the time dad got back we were all exhausted from playing in the garden.
Grandad and Anne looked after me friday night as mum and dad went out for a drink to see Chard and Kaz off on their round the world trip. If you want to see how they're getting on, click here:
http://kazandchardington.blogspot.com/
If you get stuck with your Blog Chard, give me a shout, i'm a seasoned veteran now! Have a great trip.
Saturday we went to Toys R Us again. Great Grandma had given mum a few quid for a toy for me so I got a cool golf set:

I've already smacked dad round the bare feet a few times with the clubs!
Saturday afternoon we went to Nick and Carols to watch the football, but I went out and played some more golf in their garden. Just as well as I don't think the game was up to much.
On Sunday we held another lunch in aid of Help the aged (well we had Nanny and Great Grandma aroud for lunch). I entertained them in the garden for ages with my golfing skills and trampoline antics before lunch. I decided to show them my other side during dinner by acting like a right little monkey which culminated in Dad putting me to bed! Anyway after a bit of rest I was back on it and Alan and Hanna came around as well so that was nice. Then the new slide came out:

They sneaked this one in the car yesterday and kept it from me all this time, rotters! I love slides. I had the measure of this one within a few attempts.
So that was another action packed weekend!
Monday saw the arrival of my new shoes. Mum found them on the internet and here I am with them on:

A nice pair of Etnies, they taste really nice!
Well it's that time again kids, thats right i'm off on holiday next week. Just for a change we're off to Cornwall, so it'll be a little while before my next installment.

Bank Holiday weekend!

Back to normal with a Tuesday night update this week.
Mum had Thursday afternoon off so Dad could work all day to generate a bit more time off work for the forthcoming holiday. Poor old soul, a full days work (well, he calls it work) must have really taken it out of him.
Saturday morning dad disappeared out on his bike so I made sure I got up early so mum couldn't have a lie in.
In the afternoon we went to Basingstoke shopping, I don't mind that. Saturday night Grandad and Anne looked after me while mum and dad went out to a party or something.
I let them have a lie in on Sunday morning which was probably for the best as by all accounts the bar ran out of beer at the party!!! When they were up we went to the Hawk conservancy centre near Andover (Wow, Amazingstoke and Andover in one weekend!)

Here I am with a Bald Eagle (circled for those with poor eyesight).
It was okay there really, but as soon as the flying displays started I thought i'd scream for Britain. When Dad finally cracked and dragged me out of the seating area we nearly got dive bombed by an owl and had to hide in a shed type structure until they were finished...oh dear!
I was okay while we walked around some more but at the second display I thought i'd serve up a second helping of Olympic class wailing. Oh dear again. They pulled me back from the brink this time though and I did get to enjoy the Red Kite's and eagles a little bit.
In the evening we went round to Nick and Carols for a poker night. Dad came second which was most unlike him (he beat mum into third) so I had a relatively late night. I had a nice cuddle with Carol while I stuffed my chops with their fancy crisps, result! Midway through proceedings dad spotted a furry creature out of the corner of his eye which turned out to be bass loving bat cuddling up to a sub-woofer. Mass hysteria ensued until Chris and Andy released the creature back into the wild.
We had a queit morning on Monday before going to Andy's for a barbecue in the afternoon. I had a great time and pestered everyone all afternoon, cheers everyone!